The Funny And Serious Blog

One day a kid asks his mom if he can take a shower with her. She says, "Sure son, but don't look up and don't look down.” So they're taking a shower and the kid reaches up for the soap and he says, "Woo mama! What are those?” She says, "Those are my headlights." The kid says "Ahh.”Then he drops the soap and bends down to get it and he says, "Woo mama! What is that?" and she replies back with, "That is my garage." The kid says "Ahh.”The next day he asks his dad if he can take a shower with him. The kid does. As he's scrubbing himself with the soap, he drops it. When he picks it up he says, "Woo daddy! What is that?" The father replies back, "That's my limousine.” That night he asks his parents if he could sleep with them and they say, "Sure, just don't look under the covers.” Then in the middle of the night he decides to take a peek. And he says "Woo mama! Look, daddy is parking his limousine in your garage!"

A guy walks into a bar and sits down next to a man who has a burlap sack and a little guy about a foot tall sitting on the bar playing a little piano. The guy that walked into the bar asks the man, "What's in the bag?" The man pulls out a genie lamp. The guy says, Wow! Can I have one of your wishes?" The man says, "I don't know. Rub the lamp and see." So the guy rubs the lamp and out pops the genie. The genie says, "You may have one wish.” The guy wishes for a million bucks. The genie says, "Your wish is granted," and goes back into the genie bottle. Just then one million ducks walk into the bar. The guy says, "I didn't wish for a million ducks." The man replies, "Yeah, and I wished for a twelve inch pianist."

Three nuns were talking one sunny day in June. The first nun said, "I was cleaning in Father's room the other day and do you know what I found? A bunch of pornographic magazines! ""What did you do?" the other nuns asked.”Well, of course I threw them in the trash," she replied. The second nun said, "Well, I can stop that. I was in Father's room putting away the laundry and I found a bunch of condoms! ""Oh my!" gasped the other nuns.”What did you do?" they asked.” I poked holes in all of them!" she replied. The third nun fainted.

Therese an old man laying on the beach naked and a little girl was passing buy she stops and stairs at the man and asked mister what is that. the man says what the little girl says that between your legs the man says oh that well the thing that is standing is the bird the two things on the side are the eggs and the thing around it is the nest ok the old man asked her to leave so he can get some sun he falls asleep when he wakes up there are paramedics around him he asked what happen the paramedic said ask the little girl the old man calls her over what happen the little girl said when you went to sleep I tried to make the bird fly I pulled and pulled but he got big and spit at me so I kicked the bird smashed the eggs and burned the nest.

It's the Spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date. He's a pretty hip guy with his own car. When he goes to the front door, the girl's father answers and invites him in. "Carrie's not ready yet. Why don't you have a seat? "Carrie's father asks Bobby what they're planning to do. Bobby replies politely that they will probably just go to the soda shop or a movie. "Why don't you two go out and screw? I hear all the kids are doing it!" Naturally, this comes as a quite a surprise to Bobby? So he asks Carrie's dad to repeat himself. "Yeah," says Carrie's father, "Carrie really likes to screw; she'll screw all night if we let her!”A few minutes later, Carrie comes downstairs in her little poodle skirt and announces that she's ready to go. Almost breathless with anticipation, Bobby escorts his date out the front door. About 20 minutes later, Carrie rushes back into the house, slams the door behind her, and screams at her father, "Dad, it's called the twist!"